Essays, Lists, and random silliness

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Essays / Thoughts / Lunacy

Quotes of Note Updated 31 March 2008: Here's an archive of quotes, expanded whenever I feel like it. Many thanks are due Jack Waithe, whose assistance in compiling these has been invaluable. If you have more pithy/ though-provoking/ vitriolic quotes then by all means e-mail them towards me. (14 April 2003)

The Tom Files: The chronicles of my roomie Tom and his public outbursts in the name of personal justice. (posted 04 September 2007)
Oddities From the Amazon: Have you ever been to Amazon.com, the shopping mall from the 43rd circle of the inferno? If so, have you actually read the reviews? Here are some of my favorites. Updated as I find new ones. (posted 03 October 2002, Updated 29 March 2006)

Tim Hulsizer's List of Video Game Movies and Whether or Not They Suck (posted 05 Nov. 2005)

Amusing Music Reviews: Here's some funny album reviews from various music magazines. (posted 01 May 2005)

List of American Movie Titles in Japanese: Just because I find them funny. (posted 20 February 2005)

Fortune Cookie fortunes: Here are some fortunes I've gotten over the past few years. They range from slightly poetic to mildly whimsical to outright nonsensical. Here's another one (posted 17 February 2005)

Do I Know You? Updated 15 November 2004: A bunch of messages from people who mistook me for someone else. (07 November 2002)

Random Tales Updated 09 August 2004: This is just a bunch of stories I've gotten via e-mail from friends and family. Some are silly, some are eerie, but hopefully they're all entertaining in some way. (29 February 2004)

Rick's Epistle To the Nashvillians: I've always enjoyed a good old American hard-luck story, and I've always enjoyed lawn mowers. It isn't often you find both of these in one place, but in George Jones' "Honky Tonk Song" the singer recounts the time his wife took away his car keys and he hopped on his riding mower to go find something to drink. One night I was hanging out with some friends and we all agreed that the tale was almost of biblical proportions. We challenged my friend Rick to step up to the pulpit and deliver a sermon on the subject, and this fine piece is the result. (posted 03 March 2004)

Southern Exposure Music Society: This is a music club I created with some friends in my town. Never linked it online, as I'm sure our CD-R swapping broke a million bylaws and charters of the RIAA. Now our little club seems to be defunct, so I'm throwing the link here for safekeeping. Pointless? Yeah. But it was fun while it lasted. (posted 14 December 2003)